No two kids are alike. Whatever works for your neighbor’s kids may not work on yours. Here are a few parenting philosophies and methods to help you figure out what may or may not work for your kids.
Authoritative
Authoritative parents are responsive, supportive and nurturing but also set firm limits. This is the type of parenting most of us in India have grown in. The parents use rules, discussions and reasoning with the child to control their behavior. The parents may listen to their children’s perspective but they do not always accept it. Authoritative parenting expresses high expectations with warmth, engagement and consistent boundaries.
Authoritarian
Not to be confused with the previous Authoritative philosophy, Authoritarian parents focus on obedience, control and discipline over building comfort or confidence of the child. These types of parenting expect a child to avoid all mistakes and obey at all costs. The mainstay of this parenting philosophy is being extremely strict with high expectations but minimal positive feedback or responsiveness.
Permissive (Indulgent)
Permissive parents are loving and warm but they do not set firm rules and limits or even monitor their children’s activities to ensure appropriate behavior. Their hands off attitude make them seem more like a friend than a parent. Limited demands and little to no attempt to discipline their children are the hallmarks of a Permissive or Indulgent parent.
Reflective
Reflective parents recognize their children as separate individuals with a mind of their own. The impetus is therefore on creating a strong child-parent bond based on mutual understanding and self regulation. Reflective parenting is relationship focused and places a lot of importance in understanding a child’s emotion and cognitive development.
Helicopter
Helicopter parents are much focused on their child’s activities, problems, achievements and its overall experience. They are so deeply involved with their children’s lives that ‘hover’ over them all the time, hence the name.
Bulldozer
Bulldozer or Lawnmower parenting is very much like Helicopter parenting. In addition to taking a keen interest in their children’s lives, Bulldozer parents also try to mow down any obstacles in their children’s way to make their lives as easy as possible. However, it has been noticed time and again that protecting children too much from harm or struggle may actually prevent them from developing into individuals.
Unconditional
Unconditional parenting is based on the therapeutic principles of unconditional positive regard. It is based on the values of acceptance, unconditional love and reasoning. This means accepting and supporting the child no matter how they behave. There are no punishments or rewards in Unconditional parenting. The goal here is for the child to feel valued for who they are no matter what.
Slow
Slow parenting is based on child-guided pace and authentic interests, family and play time as well as individuality of a child. Slow parenting prioritizes downtime, boredom and living in the moment. The purpose of it is to avoid over scheduling and stress. They may have limited screen time but there is enough time for a kid to be just a kid.
