Five parenting mistakes that lower the child’s confidence

Avoid these five parenting mistakes if you want your child to be confident.

Confidence brings out the best in everybody irrespective of their age and for children, confidence plays a huge part in their life. Children are one of the most vulnerable creatures and the only thing that keeps them going in this difficult, complex, competitive world is their self-confidence. And parents play an important role in building that confidence. But everyone has their own way of parenting and sometimes an unthought way can turn out to be exactly opposite what they were looking for. And in the case of building up a child’s confidence may end up making the child demoralised, stressed, scared and unconfident. Here are some of the mistakes that some parents make that make their child less confident.

Prevent them from making mistakes

Most of the parents, while being protective of their children, prevent their children from making any mistakes and facing consequences. If you really want to make your child confident enough then you have to let them make mistakes because mistakes are part of life and if they do not make mistakes they will not learn it the right way. As parents, you may protect your child for some years but at some point, your child has to face the world on/her own. And not making mistakes is not the solution to it, rather they should be allowed to make mistakes, and you should be guiding them to overcome that mistake.

Expectation of perfection

Every parent wants their kid to shine bright like a star and to be good at everything they do. But the reality is, everyone will not be good at everything they do, we are bound to fail at something. So don’t force your child to be perfect at something, just teach them the right way and let them do it on their own way at their own pace. Don’t burden your child with too much expectation as it will create pressure on them and may not enjoy the task and underperforms. Give them their space and be therefore them.

In the name of discipline punishing them

One of the worst habits of most parents is punishing their children. You have to understand the difference between discipline and punishment, and both of their consequences on your child.  Kids who are disciplined think, “I made a bad choice.” Kids who are punished think, “I’m a bad person.” In short, discipline gives your child confidence that they can make smarter, healthier choices in the future if they follow the right instruction, whereas punishment makes them think they are incapable of doing any better and they are good at nothing.

Promoting a victim mentality

Many times parents use a victim mentality to convince their child of something and present themselves (including the child) helpless.  This doesn’t help, it makes your child believe that most of life’s circumstances are out of their control and there is no way out.  Rather you should be encouraging as a parent, even if you know that something is very difficult to achieve. It will boost up their confidence and they will start putting effort into it. Playing a victim card will only stop them from trying new things.

Letting them escape responsibility

Where some parents become too strict while parenting, some become too liberal, and don’t let their children feel any responsibility. Where the first one is a bad way to handle a kid, the second one is also not the right way to treat a kid. You have to find a balance between the two. You shouldn’t be too casual, and let their child be casual as well. If you want them to be confident they need to learn how to take up and stand by their responsibilities, giving relaxation on that only brings them hardship in the future.

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