How to know if you’re in a situation ship

Non-committal relationships have been termed so many different things. There are booty calls, there’s friends with benefits, “it’s complicated” and so on. Situationship is the newest member of the no-label relationship group and no, it is not the same as dating.

Situationships are more about enjoying the relationship. Say you have been seeing someone on the reg, doing the dirty on the reg, hang out and do everything normal couples do except without the DTR – defining a relationship.

A situationship is a romantic relationship that remains undefined. You don’t do the relationship things and the conversation about defining the relationship hasn’t happened. There’s possibility of you liking the person and would like to be in a relationship but you can’t tell for sure what the other person feels about it. As situationship can be taxing especially if you are already emotionally invested.

Here’s how you know if you’re in a situationship.

Plans are always last minute

People in relationships make plans weeks, months, days ahead. In situationships, the plans are usually last minute or a day before. Weekends plans are not in their books and even an invite to a get together is usually last minute.

Consistency is missing

There is no consistency when it comes to meeting. You might be meeting each other three times one week and then go weeks without meeting up at all.

Conversations are usually short lived

No talk about each other’s families, childhood crushes, high school years or anything deep in particular. The conversations seem on the surface never really digging deeper into the past, present or future.

No talk about the future

People in a serious committed relationships can’t stop making plans for the future – like where to go for Christmas holiday, if you want kids, plans about moving in together. All conversations are about getting down and dirty and honestly that’s easier to talk about than fears, insecurities, or past relationships.

You feel anxious

In a happy, committed relationship there is no place for anxiety; not regarding the relationship anyway. Because situationships are expectation free and there’s no labelling, the unfulfilled expectations make us anxious.

You never meet each other’s friends

A heavy part of being in a relationship is meeting your partner’s friends and hanging out with them frequently. In a situationship, you never meet each other’s friends and even if you do, its seldom. You will know you’re in a situationship if your partner avoids the topic or finds excuses to not meet your friends.

Both of you are seeing other people

If both you and your situationship buddy is meeting new people and going out on dates on the reg, you are in a situationship.


As a pursuing scholar, Sanjukta lives her days reading research papers and lifestyle articles. When she is not pursuing academics, being a noob at video games keep her busy. She believes in equality and a healthy mind over anything else. She doesn't mind having a day-old pizza as breakfast. A hardcore caffeine head.
Back to top button