Why Do Women Apologize So Much?
Whether you are aware of this or not, it’s a fact that women are always apologizing. More than men. It’s so widespread that it has publications, commercials, and funny skits on the subject; even Mattel’s Barbie created a video that urged women to stop the “sorry response.”
Why is this happening? Do you think there is a biological reason for women to be sorry?
Here’s What the Science Says
As per two scientists from the University of Waterloo, it’s not because women are more gracious but because men have more of a threshold to judge the kind of behaviour considered offensive.
Also, males tend not to perceive an act as offensive. This is true regardless of whether they’re the one who is the offender or the victim of the action.
The differences in the perception of offensive, unacceptable behaviour can be attributed to how we raise girl and boys.
Women are taught to be more compassionate. While men are more applauded for their self-confidence and opinions, women are appreciated for caring for others. This emphasis on empathy conflicts with other things such as the pursuit of victory and competition, making women winners more concerned about the loss of the other.
What Happens When Women Over-Apologize?
Take a look at all the occasions you’ve said “sorry” at your home, at work, or even out and about. Perhaps it was like this:
Sorry for not responding to you sooner.
Sorry to bother you over…
Sorry, I need your assistance on some issues?
I’m sorry, but would you mind doing me a favour?
Sorry, but could you please repeat it?
Despite being seen as a sign of respect or appreciation, apologizing can also negatively impact a situation.
It can also undermine your credibility and give other people an impression that you’re untrustworthy. Sometimes, we have to apologize for actions that aren’t our fault, like when someone else runs against us or “bothering” an individual to finish their job. Refusing to apologize for these things may make you appear insecure.
In some cases, over-apologizing may even be perceived as a bit irritative. Constantly hearing “sorry” could be considered a method of seeking acceptance.
How To Stop Making Apologizing So Much
If it’s like a second-nature thing, is it possible not to be tempted to apologize or say “sorry” in embarrassing instances? Here are some methods to learn to apologize lesser:
Take a moment to think – is it really your fault?
Reframe the situation and then say “thank you” in place of “sorry”.
Accept frustrations that you aren’t able to control.
Make the situation less serious by laughing it off instead of apologizing.